Monday, July 18, 2011

The cool down...

Have I mentioned that I have come to absolutely hate the word "trying"?  Isn't it such a terrible word?!  I feel that if you are "trying" and you don't succeed, then you are labled a failure.  I'm not a failure.  Now if anyone asks whether or not we are "trying" to concieve, I just mention that we are not preventing it.  That sounds much better.  I got my period earlier this month, a few days before the 4th of July.  I felt it coming on; cramps, bitchiness, the whole nine yards.  I was actually relieved when it came this month because my good friend Korin was coming in town to celebrate the 4th.  I knew we would be on the boat all weekend and that there would be LOTS of alcoholic beverages being consumed.  l was not dissapointed at all, I was excited to be able to drink cocktails and carry on with my family and friends.  Also, David's family reunion was the weekend after the 4th.  I was glad to be able to drink a few beers and have no one questioning me with, "are you pregnant?" if I wasn't drinking.  I have really just been letting lose and enjoying the summer.  All of the pressure I put on myself before is behind me for now.  I can't tell you how great it really is to have a few drinks, let lose a little, and just live.  When we do become a family of 3, the "letting lose" part will be a thing of the past (for a while that is, until i'm ready to cut the cord and let Grandma Tess babysit).  Right now I am enjoying the right now.  I am not in "go" mode to start a family ASAP, but I will be ready when that test gives me a plus sign.  = )  I am so thankful and happy that I am letting myself relax and enjoy living in the present.  Isn't that what life is all about?  Until next time...